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trust

An act of love or suspicion?

Posted on March 29, 2021November 18, 2022 by chefswifediary

The perfect sunny day in London pretty much lightens my mood. Unlike yesterday’s cold and gloomy sky, my motivation to write is literally lifted from doomed. Reflecting how surroundings can affect our motivation to do something, perhaps they all start with mind adaptation.

Born and bred in Asia, relocating to London is a game changer for me in both personal and professional aspects. Emerging Southeast Asia, made up of a few conservative countries, yet fickle regulatory systems and governances shaped individuals in becoming more prudent, risk averse, and less trusting. Plus, growing up in an average traditional family, room for marginal errors is limited with increased face value significance. Allowance for cost of mistakes is set at the most minimum level. “Prevention is better than cure” is a part of life, whereby advices shared by seniors out of their experiences for prevention purpose are seen an act of love, even if they’re repeated over ten times. Advice acceptance is an act of respect in return.

The way I was brought up is like that, at least.

Obliged into accepting how things work in Asia, my mindset was triggered to change when interviewed for my present work role in the UK last year. Without realising, I raised a question up to 3 times of a statement that was already confirmed in both verbal and written. “I see you may have some trusting issue there?” a question that was thrown back at me right away. Was it paranoia?

From Asia to UK, there is a huge distinction in the way things work in the UK as compared to Asia. Better regulatory systems and governances create a more trusting environment, excluding crimes of course. Gradually embracing life in London, I am slowly adapting my mindset to fit new surrounding.

Reflecting then and now, whilst repeating ourselves over the same message can be an act of care or love, it can also raise sign of suspicion or distrust towards recipients.

An act of love or suspicion? No doubt, trust can only be earned over time. At the same time, suspicion can come across as an insult which takes even longer time to heal.

Surroundings do affect the way we behave, unconsciously most of the time. It’s always worth spending some time to reflect before an act turns into an unchangeable habit.

Photo by Bernard Hermant

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Corporate servant by day, blogger by night, a mommy always. Married to a chef—I love food, he brings it to life. A self-taught artist, I reflect and write about how I strive to do it all.
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