For a long time, I convinced myself that “comfortable” was the same thing as “good.” I had my current role at finger tips. I knew which stakeholders needed extra hand-holding and exactly how to navigate complexities over years of transformation. But there was a growing shadow over that comfort: leadership who took me for granted.
As a working mother, comfort often becomes a trap. We stay in roles with growing toxic dynamic or stagnant growth because we fear the unknown. We worry that a new job is a stranger that will not understand when a toddler wakes up with a fever or that flexibility is just a buzzword used during interviews.
But, staying in a place where politics prevail over output isn’t security—it’s a slow-motion burnout. If you’re nodding along, here is how to bridge the gap from a draining comfort zone to a career that actually sustains your life.
Identifying the “Invisible Tax”
Poor leadership doesn’t always look prominent; sometimes it looks like a lack of boundaries, shifting goalposts, or a subtle disregard for your time. As mothers, we often pay an invisible tax in these environments—overcompensating for our family commitments by working late, mentally occupied at night, or saying yes to every fragmented tasks coming from others negligence just to prove we’re still all in.
Recognizing that your current environment is unsustainable is the first step. You are not quitting; you are reallocating your energy to a place that offers a better return for your talent and your sanity.
Strategies for a Sustainable Leap
Moving toward a role with better work-life balance and stability requires a tactical approach. You aren’t just looking for a new job; you’re looking for a new ecosystem. That makes job hunting less straightforward.
Vetting for culture, not just perks: During interviews, don’t just ask about flexibility. Ask, “How does the team handle unexpected disruptions?” or “What does success look like here for someone who prioritizes efficiency over long hours?” Listen for mentions of asynchronous work or output-based results.
The power of “Transferable Stability”: Look for industries known for resilience. While the fast-paced start up world is exciting, established sectors often provide the structural stability that allows a working mother to breathe.
Updating the narrative: Your experience as a mother hasn’t “distracted” you from your career; it has sharpened your ability to prioritize, negotiate, and manage crises. Be proud of that efficiency.
Redefining Your Comfort Zone
Leaving a familiar role is terrifying. It feels like stepping off a ledge. But real stability doesn’t come from a predictable boss who doesn’t know how to lead —it comes from a role where your contributions are measured by impact, not presence.
A sustainable career isn’t a myth. It’s a professional environment where working mother isn’t a label you have to work around, but a part of a multi-faceted professional who is respected.
The Reality Check
The transition won’t happen overnight, and there will be moments of imposter syndrome where you miss the devil you knew. But remember: your children don’t need a mother who is comfortably exhausted; they need a mother who is empowered and present.
Taking the leap isn’t just about a pay check or a title—it’s about personal growth, reclaiming your time and showing yourself that you deserve a career that pours back into you as much as you pour into it.
Photo by Michael Dagonakis